Not that price

 It is deeply patriarchal, classist, racist and colonized to think that birthing, primary caregiving maGes who are leaving toxic relationships with men must inherently suffer and live the first part of their newly emancipated single lives in the worst emotional and housing situations.

If you believe that we must live under the most stressful conditions imaginable in order to truly value our freedom...
If you believe that since you had to, everyone else must, too...
You are the reason why so many maGes balk at the thought of leaving.

It's why we hesitate FOR YEARS and think that no one will show up for us in ways that smooth the transition for us and our children.

It's why so many of our mothers, aunts and grandmothers never left at all.

The quiet part is that, no matter how much people trumpet the idea that maGes should always be free to leave dynamics that do not serve us, the society, our circles, our communities and capitalism itself, are all set up to force us to stay with asshole cis men or to step into and through crucibles constructed in fire if we dare to leave.

If you suffered, went without and lived under atrocious conditions when you left with your children...
If you are still living under cruel and demeaning conditions as the price for your freedom...
My deepest condolences and fiercest, most heartfelt rage directed towards any individuals, groups of people or structures that made or continues to make attaining your freedom a misery.

I don't believe that a maGe's pain or anxiety is the price they must pay to leave a toxic relationship or family environment.

I don't agree to that for me or for anyone else.

Please.
Do think long and hard about this.
Search inside of yourself to see if it turns out that you do believe that a primary parenting maGe trying to strike out on their own, with one or more children in tow, has to go through hell to make it to the greener side.

The quiet part is you might actually believe that I should experience horrible deprivation, in the form of an extreme lack of options, opportunities, safety and comfort as the price for my departure.

At least be straight up about that and about the fact that you're not going to try very hard to assist me or share resources in this transition because you believe what I'm going through is only natural, right and as it should be.

My tears and fears are not supposed to be the price I pay for a fresh start.

I want to live...

The quiet part is that as late stage capitalism and austerity tighten their grip, many folks will be possess of the reasoning that none dare utter out loud.

It is that if we are to survive, if human beings are to survive, if the resistance is to survive, any resources we have available to us most be saved and shunted, towards those who are young.

I started writing this post as a fearsome anti-ageist retort to the quiet part.

I wanted to say fuck that idea of only (or mostly) giving the bulk of your mutual aid resources to folks who are younger than me because T.H.T.W.L.A.O.T. (they have their whole lives ahead of them).

But as I typed and reasoned it out, I asked myself: What can I possibly do or say that would challenge that ageist mathematic?

How can I possibly flip that idea on its head?

And why should I have to debate with an entire oppressive system and with anyone who believes that my 56 year old life is worth less than the life of a 26 year old or a teenager, in order to justify my basic human right to thrive and continue?

It's true - I don't have an entire lifespan ahead of me.

I have what remains.
10 years.
20 years.
30/40.
Whatever the number of journeys around the sun they're mine.

Even if I did not teach you and raise your awarenesses...
Even if I was not decolonizing in ways both surprising and strange...
Even if I was not a parent and guide of people I birthed at home...
Even if I was not a maker with wise ways channeled through my fingers, hands and spirit...
Even if I was not in love with the soil, with its organisms, with its nutrients and with its food bearing plants...
Even if I was not brave, wild, defiant and wicked cool...
sigh...
Even if all I did was eat and sleep and shit and piss and limp on a bad ankle and snore and jerk off and laugh like my mind was teetering on the edge and cry as if my heart was so, so broken,
I would still want to survive and thrive.

I'd still be asking for you to help.

I want to live.

Corwyn...

 Corwyn:

I’m a white, autistic butch trans woman squatting on Syilx territory which was never ceded or surrendered to the colonial state. I come from a middle-class family of white squatters.

Now, lend me a moment for a metaphor. Imagine a mountain ecosystem in your brain. Imagine the crags, the plateaus, the springs, the rivers, the rich earth, the flora and fauna spread across it, the countless minerals contained within the rock. Imagine the thousands of years of history contained within this rock alone; the geological map of time and memory. Imagine the sunlight and moonlight nourishing this environment every day and night to keep it healthy, the atmosphere protecting it from harmful extraplanetary radiation.

Now try to imagine squeezing this massively complex mountain universe through your fingertips, past your lips. This is how I feel, because I don’t know how to express what I want and need to communicate to you about Rhizome. I’ve been mulling it over all day, stuck because the magnitude of what I am trying to express is so great.

So I will just do my best. I will try.

Rhizome is one of the most remarkable people I’ve met. They have a profound understanding of the human condition, beyond what most politicians, academics or artists have achieved.

They have, through years of tireless dedication and serious work, become a tremendously talented community organizer, educator, writer, and artist. Their ability to synthesize invaluable analytical understanding and wisdom from key ingredients: an impassioned belief in community care, an indefatigable pursuit of diverse perspectives and knowledges, and the utilization of insights gleaned from personal and intergenerational traumas and triumphs.

Rhizome’s motivations and intentions have, in the six years I’ve known them, always been crystal-clear. They hold a deep and abiding love of the earth and all its inhabitants, one which to most people is merely aspirational if not outright inconceivable.

How do I know? I’ve witnessed them in these six years work every day to uphold the voices that exist, in their words, “at the margins of the margins” of society.

The type of organizing that Rhizome engages in, it’s vitally important to the future of our species. Their ability to compel others to honest self-reflection while extending the hand of compassionate care is unmatched by anyone I know — an ability comparable only to exceptional public figures such as the widely beloved Dr. Gabor Maté.

Rhizome is a person who’s suffered immensely in life from social isolation caused by abuse and multiple shunning campaigns. Throughout their hardships, I have never seen them cede an inch to the insidious forces which threaten to destroy lives and communities.

They are someone we will need more than ever in the years and decades to come. I wish I could tell you that they need our support and that this would be enough — but sadly, in our society, I need to sell you their future.

So I guess this makes me a businessperson. I urge you, my friends, don’t let them and their kid go homeless. Their fate is inextricably intertwined with yours. It is in your best interest to fight for them, so that we can have a better chance at a livable future.

Join us. We can do this if we work together.

This says so much...

A Question...

Ok. I need to ask a question.

Who here has never done mutual aid?

Like not forwarded requests.

But thrown themself into fundraising like their own lives depended on it.

I've fundraised for folks, most Indigenous women like I was choking and needed air. Not like they were but like *I* needed the air.

I made it my mission to get as much of what they requested as I could.

These were women I knew. I knew and loved them. But I was also keenly aware of being a Black, low level colonized settler living on stolen Indigenous lands. So whatever they needed now became what I needed.

No one was rushing to give them the money they requested. That's settlers for yuh.

But I knew that my friends, trusting and believing in me, would give *me* the money for them if I insisted.

While I was fundraising for them I was not in good shape. Horrible shape.

I was sick. Peri had me hemorrhaging blood clots as large as the palm of my hand for 7, 8 days out of every month.

My mental health was in the toilet because my partners were tormenting me. I was often suicidal and deeply depressed.

My family was collapsing around me and I was crying every day, despondent.

Physically I was lethargic. I missed appointments because I had brain fog so bad I couldn't remember even the most basic things.

I didn't have a social life because I was being shunned online and in meatspace.

But one thing was always clear every time I committed to fundraising.

I knew I needed those women to have that money like I needed air.

sigh...
I'm asking for this level of commitment. It's me, a descendant, survivor of the Black Holocaust, holder of many marginalized identities and recipient of numerous shunnings who needs you to crave these funds like air.

You need to struggle for air because 17 year old and I need a bright future.

That's mutual aid. That's accompliceship.

Megan

I have a phenomenal teacher.

Somehow, this person whose life has been so vastly different from my own, has helped me understand my place in this world, my own human experience, and the responsibilities I have for leaving this place better than I found it.

Every day their writing challenges me. Sometimes it feels shocking, being confronted with words and thoughts I’ve never encountered before. Those are the days I need to sit with what’s being offered, and understand my internal reactions to it.

I wish this post was about sharing this person with you, their ideals, their incredible wisdom.

But I can’t. Rhizome is currently leaving an abusive home, and needs funds to get a new home within the month. This means there isn’t time for each of us to get acquainted with their writing before sending our support. Without our help, Rhizome and their kid will be homeless by the end of the month.

Rhizome needs to start over from scratch, with their youngest son. He’s a neuro-spicy teenager who is just now picking up the tools he needs to self-regulate in a world built for neurotypicals. It is critical for him to continue having his parent’s protection and guidance as he grows through his challenges–as a Black teen, his life depends on it.

It is my hope that enough folks will chip in that Rhizome can find a safe home for their family, and to even have enough space for a little garden to aid in their healing journey. 

They need rental deposits, moving costs, a few months of runway on the rent while they find employment, household goods, and pay for some repairs to their only mode of transportation – a moped. They will also need to cover all living, prescription and dental expenses for themself and their son.

My hope is also that with this safety, they will be able to use their voice, loud and clear, to continue making this planet a better place to exist.

It feels quite overwhelming to embark on leaving abuse, and the logistics may seem impossible. But together we can provide this safety net for Rhizome as they take these courageous next steps. Join me in helping them find their way.

Shawna

My name is Shawna.

I am a white disabled queer maGe living on stolen and commodified Indigenous lands of the Tsuiel Wal'tuth, Squamish and Musqueam nations in colonially known greater vancouver area.

I am a single parent and have worked in addictions and mental health almost all my life. I am in schooling with an Indigenous-led University to deepen my knowledge of the rightful guardians of this land that I am graciously allowed to live on.

I greatly value the writing and thoughts of Rhizome. I am thankful to learn and be challenged by them regularly. My awareness has grown, and my understanding has been strengthened, having been able to learn from Rhizome.

Rhizome has been gracious with their emotional energy, tirelessly sharing their examinations of intersectional oppressions of marginalized genders and communities. 

They share brilliant analysis on topics of racism, colonialism, mutual aid and community building. They are a passionate and outspoken activist and accomplice for many communities beyond their own. They fight endlessly against abuse and injustice.

In the 6 years I have gotten know them, they have shared their experiences parenting in this late capatalist hellscape. I admire their thoughtful and generous ways of parenting. I have learned a lot about how I want to parent from them. 

Rhizome is a trailblazing revolutionary who deserves to be valued, protected and supported. No parent should have to struggle for housing and food.

It is  just 4 weeks away from the eviction date and without our financial support, they will be homeless with their child.

Especially if you benefit from the systems of white supremacy, have generational wealth that was likely gained by the exploitation of people and land resources, help to redistribute the wealth!

Please join me, in mutual aid, to support my incredible friend by donating and sharing this urgent plea to your networks.

Guipago

 Hey y'all. This post is going to be a bit long, but I hope you take the time to read it. Especially if you know anything about me. (You all should at this point. )

I am going to start this post with a few things about me. Why? Because in this case, who I am has been directly impacted by the person I will be talking about. And because of that, you need to understand why I am stepping outside of my comfort zone to do what I am doing.

If you've been around awhile you've probably ascertained a few things about me, the very basics that I'm referring to are below.

1. I like to help people.
2. I like to learn.
3. I do not like to take credit for things that are not mine.

I like to help people, I do it in my own way, and I do it quietly as much as I can. I do not like a lot of fan fair when I do a thing. It makes me very uncomfortable. But, if you know me, you know I wheel and deal behind the scenes to help those that I can, when I can. Whether it's spending my time and energy, or financial assistance when I can, whatever.

When you couple this with my inability (I'M TRYING) to ask for help, I usually help with things that I can directly give. Often to the point of over-extending myself.

I like to learn about things. And as I learn new things, I LOVE to share them. I'm not a vocal "sharer".  And I do not, DO NOT like to take credit for ideas and thoughts that are not my own. If you've worked with me, you'll know that if you came up with a brilliant idea, I will show case you till the cows come home. (Usually around dinner time, unless there's coyotes out, then it's any time).

But, I don't do a lot of waving of hands and tooting of horns.

I can be in the spotlight, and I can handle it, but I don't *like* it.

Now, on to the purpose of this post. I am lucky to have a lot of white-presenting, cis-female privileges in my life. It allows me to be quiet and do things calmly behind the scenes. I know this.

There are different types of folks who are fighting to change the world. The ones like me that try to change it one person at a time when we can. The helpers, the supporters, the caretakers. The folks that do the rapid strikes, and the long haulers who continuously hammer home messages.

And then there are the "tanks" of the world of change. The ones who stay outspoken and remain outspoken. The ones who get bullseyes painted on their backs, take the hits, and keep on trucking forward. Who know that their messages need to be heard, take the blows that come, and stand up fighting.

I have had a lot of fantastic teachers and mentors - people that don't even know what they've been up to, and some that go out of their way to share their thoughts, feelings, and try to change the world around them.

The latter folks don't always rub people the right way. This can lead to huge breaks in relationships, it can lead to people doing what they need and going their own way. It can lead to people knee-jerking and doing insane things to make their spaces comfortable again. Or, it can lead to people taking the time to learn and move forward.

Rhizome Syndrigast Coelacanth Flourishing has been a lightning rod for change in non-binary, intersectional, POC, and the art of growing older ferally.

They have, for a few years now, taken the time to share their work, their thoughts, and their experiences on multiple social media platforms and Patreon while dealing with a world that has been working to grind them down day after day.

I met Rhizome through a friend who is no longer mutual with them, for their own reasons. I have people in my life because of Rhizome I would not have been able to connect with elsewise. Brilliant people who stand on the forefront of helping others and changing the way society thinks of those that aren't socially "normal". (Who wants to be normal anyway?)

Rhizome is in desperate need of help. Without help, they and their son are going to lose the roof over their heads and they are trying, folks. Trying hard to move mountains to take care of themselves and their progeny.

They have less than 30 days to find a new home, take care of their kid, and keep striving to find ways to make money. They have been a stay at home parent for over 20 years, and have a huge gap in employment that they are attempting to work through.

During this time, while managing difficult life situations, Rhizome has stood up for a vast majority of marginalized folks, helped numerous people, and has helped me just by being who they are to take me outside of my comfort zone and helping me learn new things.

They have gone above and beyond to talk about areas I have no knowledge of, commiserate on areas I do know about, and give insight to areas I'm moving into as I grow older. They have helped me grow as a person, even when I have to withdraw and sit with my initial reactions to some of the things they say. Because those knee-jerks are on me, not them.

We all know life gets hard, and things get shitty. I'm not asking you to do more than you can. I am only asking that if you can spare a few bucks for their go-fund me, please do. If that is outside of your realm of possibility - help share their community pages.

No one deserves the shit that life throws at them. And everyone deserves some sort of covering over their head when they sleep at night if they so choose.  Everyone deserves a safe place that is their own.

Please help in the ways that you can. I will put the gofundme and the community blog in the comments so they are easy to reach.

(Kitten picture for tax and algorithms)

Bash

My name is Bash, I am a Five year Community Care Worker, a white trans masc non-binary, disabled asexual/aromantic dude who has worked across  all social media platforms.

My friend, Rhizome a queer, nonbinary, Black and older has been someone I've been following now for around  five years. The past few years we have gotten very close.

When I was asked to join a support team for Rhizome I was glad there was finally going to be a time that I could give back to Rhizome even in small part for how much Rhizome has given to me and the entire queer, and leftist community.

Encapsulating just exactly what Rhizome does, writes about, and shares with the our community is difficult.

Because Rhizome's work is so expansive across  so many marginalizations  and subjects, my growth from having known them is exponential, so too has the growth of all who follow them.
They have been giving to the queer and leftist community for decades, expanding knowledge, political theory and language.

They have not done this easily, without risk or suffering, they have not done this without personal loss.

Rhizome educates us to this day specifically target intersectional areas such as ageism and archiaomisogyny, misognoir, trans misogyny, anti-Blackness, decolonization and colonialism through out culture, social contract, social capitol, the structures of these things and their dynamics, the unpacking and the necessary destruction of convention and ultimately, they bring a voice clearer and more compassionate than you have ever heard, while bearing the righteous rage of someone too long having suffered under these pervasive, insidious and fatal structures.
and because of these same structures they are now having to start their entire life over with their child, and their pets.
 

Starting from zero they will be uprooting everything they have known for decades, with nothing in savings, no resources, no wealthy family or friends, no colleagues to bear them out. 

And now we call on you. They have been served a notice to vacate by their landlord - Rhizome and their son must move by the end of June.
 

Whether Rhizome and their child will be homeless by the end of the month or if they survive is now in our hands, and in yours if you've read this.

Kitson...

I'm Kitson - queer, disabled, neurodivergent, Red River Métis, and tasta-ee-iniw (nonbinary transmasc for those who adhere to colonial gender systems). My entire career is based in community / family services, and I had to become an expert on human behaviour in order to survive my childhood.

I first encountered Rhizome's writing on Facebook at least before 2017 (the math is fuzzy) and I was immediately drawn in by the thought processes of an obviously (to me) neurodivergent, nonbinary Black feminist settler writer and artist.

I have witnessed them be subjected to 3 organized online shunnings by younger AFAB "feminists" who were angered by my friend's refusal to be put into a pseudo-parental role without their consent, or be held accountable for the theft of their writings. This has cost them a LOT in terms of followers and monthly subscriptions to their writings.

My friend has also been heavily isolated in their city for their refusal to fall in line with the dominant classist hierarchy within their spheres. Again, this has cost them immensely in terms of lost opportunities to be self sustainable financially.

I value Rhizome a great deal as their own being, and I also value how their writing has shifted my own perspectives. Not everyone can handle their forthright descriptions of the overarching issues built into our society, though I definitely tell my other friends to push through their discomfort when reading their posts about classism and ageism in particular.

Now my friend needs help to find housing for themself and their 17 year old neurodivergent son in a city with horrific rents, with no credit, references, or money.

This is where you come in.

I'm asking you to donate if you have the means, and to share their gofundme within your own social spheres whether or not you donate.

Especially if you can't donate funds.

One of the fastest growing demographics of homeless people in North America is that of people assigned female at birth (AFAB) that are 50+ and with or without children.

Please help me help my friend.

https://www.homelesshub.ca/about-homelessness/population-specific/families-children

A Beginning...

This is the community space associated with the GoFundMe created to manifest a great start for Rhizome (they/them) as they step out into the next leg of their life journey. We're showing up to ask you to be a part of this push to get resources for our friend and community member.

Below you will see us showing up with Rhizome's flowers while they are still alive. They are older, queer, nonbinary, disabled, neurodivergent, parent, a writer and artist, an active part of many online platforms and they deserve all our accompliceship. This is the space where we talk about Rhizome, the impact of their work on each of us and why we think you should donate to Rhizome's fundraiser.

Please read our words of accompliceship and care. We want to celebrate Rhizome and share with you who they are!